When I was in college, I used to try to get classes that started at 10:00am. Not so that I could sleep in, but so that I could wake up at 6:00am, eat breakfast, mosey around, and drink coffee on the big, fluffy red couch next to the window with non-school related reading in my lap.
Here in grown-up land, I have to leave the house at 8:30am for work. I also cannot take naps during the day (possibly, the hardest part about moving on in life), my desk location never changes, I sit next to the same people day in and day out, and my work doesn’t change every “semester”.
Needless to say, it is a little hard these days to get up 3 hours before I have to leave for work so that I can take my sweet time getting ready.
I know I keep mentioning waking up early to read like it’s some new revelation I have discovered….well, I kind of feel like a piece of me that I thought I had to let go of when I became old and responsible, has come back. In a sneaky way. The experience has been not unlike what I suspect Wendy Darling might have felt when Peter Pan came back to her window when she was a grown, unimaginative woman: that faint rememberence of what life used to be like, that you did not think you missed so much.
A sense of rebellion, the cheating of time, and pleasant feelings about the more enjoyable things in life, have all come back to me in the form of a few golden moments all to myself curled up under my pale green comforter with a book, before I have to swing my legs over the side of the bed and stand up, look in the mirror, and remind myself that I work in this world where childhood and care free days are all but forgotten…or frowned upon alotgether. I am not sure which.
I am undercover here in the U.S. Senate. Shhhhh don’t tell anyone. I do my job well and I give it my all when I am there, but I cherish so many other things about life so much more than the passing of legislation and the next step up on the career ladder. And especially in this moment, Neverland is sounding like an ideal place to
Left: Undercover Right: In my natural habitat
“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entaglenments; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket–safe, dark, motionless, airless–it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is Hell.” – C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
Sometimes, this is dinner.
Sometimes, when you have to stay late at work three nights in a row with the expectation of going in again on Saturday, and your fiance has a busy work week too and can’t take you to the grocery store thus you are collecting crumbs for dinner, an apple and peanut butter has to be just great.
I did not cut up 6 apples, by the way, that is just a big apple (purchased at the Senate coffee shop because that is my range of motion these days…go ahead, wipe away your tears).
But last night, after an extra long day at work, and after almost 4 whole days of not seeing my fiance, Eric took me to our favorite little sushi restaurant, Sticky Rice.
Good food and the person you love do wonders for a tired body and brain turned into mush.